Conversation in the car: Friday

Kiley:  What do you want for Mother’s Day?

Me:  I don’t know.  Whatever.  I mean, you don’t have to get me anything.  How about you just be nice to me for an entire day?

Kiley:  Um, ok.  What do you want though?

Me:  I don’t know.

Kiley: Argh.  There isn’t anything you want?  If you could have anything….

Me:  I want a Sonicare toothbrush.  They are like $120.  A little out of any of our price ranges.

Kiley:  A toothbrush, mom???

Me:  They are super cool, and they make this wicked strange sound when you brush.

Kiley:  Omg, mom, it’s a toothbrush.  You brush your teeth less than 5 minutes a day, and you WANT a toothbrush.  You need to get a life.  That’s what I’m buying you for Mother’s Day, a life. 

Me:  BWAHAHAHAHA!

Pics of the day 4.28.08

 Teenager: playing dead.

Alive

Hey girl!  Hope you had fun out east this weekend! 

I spent the weekend breaking in our new couch.  I’ve been soooo exhausted.  I think the events of the last few weeks caught up to me.  I pulled off a couple half-assed loads of laundry and emptied the dishwasher…..that’s about it.  Lot’s of reality tv.  I would be knee-deep in self-loathing right now if I didn’t have 3 more weeks of craziness to look forward to.

Speaking of craziness, I get to attend a special Hindu ceremony next weekend in Lexington, NE.  Apparently, 4 pm on Saturday is the last time this ceremony can happen before the wedding on May 24th.  Something to do with astrology.  It will be Lisa (another bride’s maid), me and probably most of the Indian community in western Nebraska.  Not sure what it all entails, but I will be sure to take a few pics. 

Have I told you lately how excited I am for June?  I keep day dreaming about photo booths, Threadless, and nude badminton.  IT WILL HAPPEN….even if we have to have Frederick hold up a net on the beach of Lake Michigan.

I wish I had something witty or entertaining to type about.  I just can’t drum it up right now.  I really just wanted to relieve some guilt by posting SOMETHING. 

K, off to take out the garbage since my evil teenage daughter is refusing.  It’s surprising to me that there isn’t more media about “shaken teenager syndrome”.  Never in babyhood did I dream of doing her any harm.  The thought crosses my mind multiple times a day lately.

Love you, fer

 

Reason 1,042 I should have sent her to Lincoln High

Transcript of conversation between Kiley and I at 6:00 pm this evening:

Ki: (hopping into the car after grabbing some Amigos take out) There’s a girl who works here that goes to my school.

Me:  Yeah?

Ki:  Yeah, she’s like super blonde and popular.

Me: Huh.

KI: It’s kind of weird that she would work here.

Me:  Why?  What’s wrong with Amigos?

Ki:  No, it’s just weird that she would work at this one.

Me:  Whhhhyy?

Ki:  It’s scary over here.  I mean, what if she had to work past 9.  It would freak me out if I worked there.

Me:  Kiley!  It’s 16th and South.  This neighborhood is just fine.  It’s not scary.  I think your school is skewing your view of the world.  I should have sent you to Lincoln High.  You have no exposure to anything but rich white people.

*silence*

Ki:  Am I half black?

Me:  Bwahahahahaa!!!

Yes, she’s a black Scandinavian.

I think our next summer vacation should be to Detroit.  Just saying.

So, this wedding stuff is consuming my life.  God forbid she find this blog before her wedding, because I am going to sound like a bitch right now. 

I am not cut out for this.  I am stressing big time.  The bachelorette and shower are this upcoming weekend.  Everything is planned out, but every time I think about it I start to hyperventilate.  Saturday night we are having dinner at an expensive joint in Omaha.  I mean, I think we could easily drop $150 a person.  Then we are heading to this club called Nomad where “we” (the bridal party) have reserved a VIP cabana with bottle service.  BOTTLE SERVICE.  The girls have already ordered a good bottle of gin and a good bottle of vodka.  Last time I checked my driver’s license didn’t read Sean Combs.  Also, I work in a cubicle at an insurance company…..not even with a window view.  In other words, I may have to take money out of my 401K just to afford this party.  Did I mention that we are picking up the bride’s tab for the entire evening?

The next day is the shower at DISH in Lincoln.  We have to make sure the bartender working gets at least $100 in tips.  We also are ordering appetizers and bringing in a cake.  Lisa and I are going gift shopping for those who win the shower games and door prizes.   

So, I guess I need to shave my legs.  I should probably also dig out a pair of shoes with a little more heel than my Van’s.

To do list:

• Find a guestbook for the shower
• Find an outfit for Saturday and one for Sunday
• Order the cake
• Freak the fuck out

By the way, Brenna has already been sighing and getting wrinkle lines over the few things I have bought so far for this wedding.  She has no idea what’s to come.  Alterations for my wedding outfits, clothes to wear for all of the events surrounding the wedding, wedding shoes, wedding hair styling, food and drink for the Mehndi (I am hosting this also), the wedding gift, etc and etc.  I fear B may have a nervous breakdown before the end of May.

Don’t get me wrong.  I am excited to be a part of this wedding and I am very happy for her.  It’s just a little more than my budget can handle.  It’s also a lot more work than I anticipated.

ANOTHER REASON I CANNOT WAIT UNTIL JUNE!!!!!!!!!

I loved your last post with the photo tutorial  I love it.  Just so you know, I would drink your life juice every day.  In fact, we should make some while I’m there.  Wheatgrass?  Is it super expensive?

Have you heard of this stuff?  www.monavie.com  I had someone tell me that drinking 4 ounces of this stuff every day cured their need for antidepressants.  I think I’m gonna order a bottle.  I’m a sucker for easy answers.

 Ok, I’m gonna go watch TV with B. 

Photo of the day tomorrow!

Important

Did you know Jolly Ranchers makes a new candy that is a lot like Zotz?!?!?  Um, you’d best be headin’ to Walgreens like right now to get some.  The Cherorange flavor is my fave.  They’re called Jolly Ranchers Blasts.

While we are on the topic of must haves from Walgreen’s, I purchased the Drew Barrymore Covergirl mascara on Saturday.  Totally worth the $10.

Ugh, It’s Monday afternoon and I would cut a bitch for a glass of wine.  After work I have to run to the nursing home and drop off laundry, take Ki to Sprint, and then go to Kiley’s band concert.  Hopefully, it’s a short concert.  Why, why do they schedule this stuff on a Monday….the longest, suckiest day of the week?  As if parenting isn’t hard enough. 

I will, will, will get some more photos scanned this week.  Probably not tonight, but maybe tomorrow?  or Wednesday? 

Curious….about Ali.  It’s sounds like Steph had a great time.  Has she lightened up on the homo=hell thing? 

Keep me updated on Steph’s appointments.  I hope it’s all just hyper-awareness of symptoms and not anything more.  Man, you guys really don’t need another round of crap when the this round hasn’t even ended yet.

Hugs and kisses, fer

 

Pregnant lady: “…and when the baby comes I already have lots of hemp clothes for her. And I’m buying totally organic baby food. All natural products.”

Friend: “And then are you going to smoke a bowl with it, hippie?”

- Red Line

http://overheardinchicago.blogspot.com/

Tuesday. Home alone. Why can’t I entertain myself?

Britto- 

So, I’ve been watching this show High School Confidential.  It’s a documentary about a group of girls in a high school around Overland Park, KS.  It was filmed over 4 years….their freshman through senior year.  I’m hooked.  Don’t know why.  I have a real live one here at home.  You’d think that I have enough teenage angst around here to keep me busy. 

That’s all.  Just thought I would share.

So, my mom’s new big-girl clothes are in the dryer.  Just 30 more minutes till I can get to snapping (literally).  In the meantime, I’m gonna crack open one of these picture boxes.  Prepare yourself for more emails. 

Speaking of pics, did you see the one of me, Kirsta and Bob Kerry on flickr?  It was printed in the Kearney paper, so you know, I’m basically famous.

I can’t wait to see the pics that arrive in the mail this week.  Little Deakie Lee, awww.  If I run across any more photobooth pics, I am just going to mail them to you.  This way we can keep them all together.  Once we do Chi-town photobooths, we can put them together and maybe make some sort of masthead/background for our blog, eh?  Or cement them into something permanent?  Or make t-shirts, mousepads, and mugs at Walgreens.  Or….I could go on forever. 

On the Chicago itinerary, I think we should try to do some photoboothing on Friday too.  I know the girls will be pooped from IKEA, but after a couple of shorties I’m sure you and I can drum up the energy.  Right?  I almost think we should map out the photobooths in relation to where we are on all of the days.  Maybe stop in one on Pride?  The more photoboothing the better.  Could I say photobooth more?  I sound like rain man.

Love, fer